Don’t face fear alone. Find your person. Lean in to their strength so they can hold you through your fear. That is not weak; that is wise. This I learned . . .
Fear is Real
The worst dream I ever had happened a few years ago. We lived in our old ranch style house where our bedroom was at the end of a hallway. I vividly remember in my dream that was a nightmare that a man dressed in black was walking slowly down the hallway to our room. It was the confident, slow walk of an evil someone who knows exactly what they are after. I was screaming and crying because I knew he was coming for me. I remember struggling against my covers and huddling against the headboard of our bed, terrified because in my dream I knew what this man was going to do to me.
I woke up to Benj hugging me, trying to calm me down because my screams weren’t just in my dream. They were real, just like the feelings in my dream left a real mark on my conscious.
Don’t Face Fear Alone
Even though the fear of that dream sticks with me even now, what also sticks with me is how Benj held me through my fear. He had no idea what was in my head, but he knew it was horrifying to me, so he hugged me and brought me back to reality.
Benj did that for me again years later, only the second time, that fear wasn’t a dream. It was an illogical fear based in an illogical disease just like the illogic of a man walking down the hallway to attack me in our home. Benj got me the help I needed to overcome the fear of my eating disorder and brought me back to the truth of who I am, not who ED wanted me to be.
We all need someone like that – the person who sees us in our fear and holds us tightly, and even through our kicking and screaming, our person refuses to let go. It’s our person of logic even when we can’t see it.
God doesn’t leave us alone. He uses the people in our lives to be his love in a tangible way. I pray that you have a person like that in your life. I pray you have someone like that so you don’t face fear alone. And if you think you don’t, look closer. Look closer into their eyes, but also look closer into your own fear. Don’t let the fear keep them at arms length. Let them in, and trust that they see you for real, even if you are stuck in your dream.
Because no one should ever believe that they have to face their fears alone. God made us for each other, in the time and space when we need each other the most.